How Social Media Erases Identity (Part 1)

Social media is weakening the social groups that give people purpose

People deserve to be heard and to have a voice — even when that means defending the right of people we disagree with.

— from Meta's "Our Mission" page¹

When everyone feels safe to share their voice, great conversations can happen.

— from X's "Our Rules" page²

Our mission is to inspire creativity and bring joy.

— from TikTok's "About" page³

Social media companies are under the illusion that their products are all about helping people discover or express their voice and their creativity. But, ironically, these products are much better at erasing an individual's unique attributes. At the surface level, of course, social media does provide a platform for people to speak who may not have been able to otherwise. For example, people in many third world countries (excluding those under authoritarian regimes) are able to access and post on the same internet as people from first world countries. I would argue, however, that in many cases social media is better at shaping people’s voices than amplifying them, making it a negative force overall. Over my next few posts, I will be highlighting three ways that social media causes its users to lose their unique identities, first by exploring how it makes social groups more superficial.

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The Importance of Social Groups

Our identities are intertwined with the people around us: the social groups we choose to associate with, how we engage with others in them, and how we interact with those on the outside. Social media has not removed our ability to join communities we identify with. If anything, its made it easier than ever to connect with special interest groups. It does, however, influence how we engage inside and outside these groups. Instead of deep, critical engagement, these social connections (and the identities built upon them) are becoming far more superficial.

Communities can take many forms, but two categories of social groups that most people identify with in some way are political groups and religious groups. In both these cases, I will explore how social media has made it more difficult to engage with those inside and outside of a person's community.

Political Identity

In his classic book, Amusing Ourselves to Death, Neil Postman highlights a debate held between Abraham Lincoln and Stephan Douglas in Peoria, Illinois. The debate itself lasted for seven hours and was filled with sophisticated rhetoric and complex arguments pertaining to the political issues of the day. But the demographics of this crowd were not elite intellectuals in the slightest. Rather, Postman describes the event as taking place in a "carnival-like atmosphere"⁴ where common people from the area (farmers, businessmen, doctors, young people, the elderly) all came together to engage intellectually. He observes, "[t]hese were people who regarded such events [political debates] as essential to their political education, who took them to be an integral part of their social lives."⁵

Just like in the 1850s, political affiliation is a core part of many people's identities today. At the same time, a scene like this would now be unimaginable. There are a plethora of important political issues to be discussed, but more often than not politics today is an appearance game. When presidential debates were televised, for example, Postman explains that politicians

were less concerned with giving arguments than with 'giving off' impressions, which is what television does best. Post-debate commentary largely avoided any evaluation of the candidates' ideas, since there were none to evaluate. Instead, the debates were conceived as boxing matches, the relevant question being, Who KO's whom? The answer was determined by the 'style' of the men--how they looked, fixed their gaze, smiled, and delivered one-liners.⁶

In the age of social media, this effect is exacerbated. Many people now form their political views based on viral 60-second clips or short tweets. If asked to debate an issue for even five minutes, I suspect that a lot of people would realize that they have little foundation for the political beliefs that play into their identity. Why? Because their group no longer presents them with robust defenses of their beliefs and they avoid any good-faith discussion with their political opponents. Social media's culture of soundbites and hatred has squandered both these important aspects of developing a robust and grounded political identity.

Religious Identity

Oftentimes, religious community is even more central to a person’s identity than their political views, but these communities face an equally significant threat in social media. Concerning evangelical Christianity, recent years have seen the rise of virtual "churches," like life.church.⁷ Life.church boasts that it offers over a hundred livestream services each week on YouTube, Facebook, and other social media platforms. In these livestreams, however, the closest you get to human interaction is a chat feature, where hosts (or sometimes bots) invite you to type "YES" or raise an emoji hand if you want to give your life to Jesus.

Such churches can be quite appealing. They’re very accessible—people no longer have to get up and drive to church on a Sunday morning, they can instead join a service at a convenient time from the comfort of their home. People can also join anonymously, making the perceived barrier to attending church much lower for someone who might be uncomfortable showing their face at a local church community.

But the very things that make online churches initially appealing are also their downfall. A Pew Research Center report⁸ based on a survey conducted in 2022 of 11,377 adults in the U.S. confirms what might be expected. While a majority of people watching church online are satisfied with the sermons they listen to, only "25% of those who regularly watch religious services online say they feel like active participants" and only 28% of people "feel a great deal or quite a bit of connection with the people who are attending the service in person."

These statistics are damning to the idea that online churches can sufficiently support a congregation. Online churches may be accessible, but they are also passive; they might be anonymous, but they’re also isolating.

Right after the Church is formed at Pentecost, Acts 2:42–47 describes the new body of believers, observing that

they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.⁹

This passage makes clear that the Church should be embodied and personal. God did not just command the gathering of believers to hear his word, though that is an important part of church. He also intended for it to be a place of vibrant community. Christians are meant to be part of one another's lives: eating together, praying together, worshipping God together, and supporting one another through hardship.

Part of what makes churches so unique is that they are gatherings of people with vastly different backgrounds. One congregation can be home to men and women of all ages, races, socioeconomic statuses, and careers. Authentic diversity can be appreciated and encouraged because everyone is united by one central identity, their faith in God. In fact, healthy churches show how beneficial it is for very different people to come together with their strengths and weaknesses to care for one another and the community.

Community is such an important part of the Christian life and it is also important in other religions. Even many atheists come together to discuss their belief that there isn't a god. This is because living in community is one of the best ways to strengthen one's faith. But when social media makes participating in these groups passive and isolating, people no longer glean from them as they used to. Instead, religious communities are weakened, causing people to lose a key support of their faith.

Pursuing Depth and Honesty

Despite the hurdles social media throws at you, it is still possible to connect with others in a way that strengthens you. The key is to go out of your way to pursue depth and vulnerability.

Some of my favorite lyrics come from a song, "Talk About That," by musician and songwriter Patrick Droney. The song highlights many things we tend to keep to ourselves: past trauma, questions about faith, the struggles of growing up, the fear of death fast approaching. In the chorus, Droney laments our inability to talk substantively with others about such personal topics.

No I don't know why we don't talk about that

We're all growing up just a little too fast

We all have words we can't say back

And look too long at a photograph

We all got something that we think we lack

Holdin' onto bags that we can't unpack

All need help but we don't ask

Maybe we should talk about that

"Talk About That" is a powerful plea for people to be honest with one another and be willing to talk about the myriad of things that help to make us who we are. But when we're hiding behind our phone screens, we have no reason to share these things with one another when we can just keep posting filtered photos and videos of ourselves to keep up appearances. It takes risk and effort to pull down the filter and open yourself up to others. In an age where people are used to seeing everyone else's curated lives, it might be startling to some people. But it's what we all need if we want to protect who we really are instead of letting social media make us something else.

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Thanks for reading! My next post will continue this discussion of social media and identity, focusing on how social media has led to a loss of interest in the hobbies and activities that help form a person’s identity. If you found this post interesting and want to be notified when the next post is published, you can subscribe below. :)

1. https://about.meta.com/company-info/

2. https://help.twitter.com/en/resources/rules

3. https://www.tiktok.com/about?lang=en

4. Postman, Neil. Amusing Ourselves to Death. Penguin Books, 1985. pg. 47

5. Postman, 44

6. Postman, 97

7. https://www.life.church/

8. https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/2023/06/02/americans-experiences-with-virtual-religious-services/#the-virtual-worship-experience

9. https://www.esv.org/Acts+2/